Monday, August 20, 2007

The KJV vs. the NIV - What Was Left Out?

I recently found some questions regarding the NIV, the challenge was to answer the following questions with the NIV, none of which you actually can because in the NIV, these are all correctly recognized as being of dubious origin or as scribal insertions. The idea here was that the KJV is more "accurate" than the NIV, but in fact, whoever wrote this just proves the shaky ground the KJV stands on. You see, you can't prove something with evidence that doesn't hold up in court, just like you cant expect a sweater vest to stop bullets like Kevlar can. So, here's a few little sarcastic answers to these questions.


Fill in the missing words in Matthew 5:44. "Love your enemies,__________ them that curse you, ______________ to them that hate you, and pray for them that __________ and persecute you." Does anyone know what "Some late manuscripts" means?

According to Matthew 17:21, what two things are required to cast out this type of demon?
Burgers and Fries. Only some manuscripts have this verse.

According to Matthew 18:11, why did Jesus come to earth?
We know why from other places, again only some manuscripts.

According to Matthew 27:2, what was Pilate's first name?
Pontius is a title, not a name people, besides, would it matter if his name were Bob? Yep, there's ol' Bob Pilate, he can grill up some goooood steak, uh huh.

In Matthew 27:35, when the wicked soldiers parted His garments, they were fulfilling the words of the prophet.
Sure were, I wonder which one. See the Book of David. Right after Second Bill.

Copy what the prophet said in Matthew 27:35 from the NIV.
You'd have to check with the prophet himself, Matt here didn't see fit to include it.

In Mark 3:15, Jesus gave the apostles power to cast out demons and to: ____________ Bust a move. We know they can heal from other places.

According to Mark 7:16, what does a man need to be able to hear?
Uh, feet? Seriously, does Mark really need to tell me what appendages I need to be able to hear?

According to Luke 7:28, what was John? (teacher, prophet, carpenter, etc.). What is his title or last name?
Does it matter, or should we name him after what he did? Then would it matter?

In Luke 9:55, what did the disciples not know?
Know? Know what? Jesus rebuked them, they obviously didn't know something.

In Luke 9:56, what did the Son of man not come to do? According to this verse, what did He come to do?
Is he supposed to save? That's what it says elsewhere.

In Luke 22:14, how many apostles were with Jesus?
Does it matter? How many are often included in "The Apostles."

According to Luke 23:38, in what three languages was the superscription written?
I guess three languages would make it a pretty big sign, it wouldn't leave any room for Jesus' head.

In Luke 24:42, what did they give Jesus to eat with His fish?
Fish.

John 3:13 is a very important verse, proving the deity of Christ. According to this verse (as Jesus spoke), where is the Son of man?
If it don't belong there, it don't prove nothin'.

What happened each year as told in John 5:4?
Hanukkah. I'd have said Christmas, but this fits so much better.

In John 7:50, what time of day did Nicodemus come to Jesus?
Earlier, like the text says.

In Acts 8:37, what is the one requirement for baptism?
Water, I guess.

What did Saul ask Jesus in Acts 9:6?
He didn't have to ask, Jesus told him.

Write the name of the man mentioned in Acts 15:34.
Either "they" or "the brothers" take your pick.

Study Acts 24:6-8. What would the Jew have done with Paul?
Would 'a' could 'a' should 'a'.

What was the chief captain's name? What did the chief captain command?
Who really knows seeing as how it wasn't recorded?

Copy Romans 16:24 word for word from the NIV.
It’s not there, know why?Because only SOME manuscripts contain it.Additionally, it is not doctrinally significant in any way anyway.

First Timothy 3:16 is perhaps the greatest verse in the New Testament concerning the deity of Christ. In this verse, who was manifested in the flesh?
He. Who do you think?

In the second part of First Peter 4:14, how do [they] speak of Christ? And, what do we Christians do?
Oh, the usual.

Who are the three Persons of the Trinity in First John 5:7?
Not sure, that verse was added well over a thousand years after the time of Christ.

Revelation 1:11 is another very important verse that proves the deity of Christ. In the first part of this verse Jesus said, "I am the A______________ and O___________, the _________ and the _______:"
Again, if it don't belong there, it don't prove a thing.

That's the whole flaw in the King James Only argument. You can use whatever verse you want to prove whatever you want, but at the end of the day, if those verses were not in the original manuscripts, and don't belong there, then all you have proven is how foolish you look using a Bible written in a language you don't speak. The only King James Bible I have is a Spanish version, and I looked up these verses in that. The thing is, I know about as much Spanish as King James Only people know 1611 English. You see, language evolves over time, and even the King James we have today is not the same one they had. For instance, the original KJV had no letter J, and included the Apocrypha, and you don't see anyone trying to roll back to those do you.

Love the one you're with, Sword that is,
WiredForStereo.

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